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What the movie critics really mean – by Doug Saunders of the Toronto Globe and Mail.

demanding    unwatchable
rigorous        tedious
playful        stupid
unabashed    shamelessly stupid
aspires, aims     fails
subtle emotions    no acting whatsoever
beautifully rendered images    very, very slow
epic    very, very long
provocative    sex scenes
tender    nudity
effervescent    vapid
ambiguous    underlit
gritty    underexposed
raucous    overacted
outrageous performances    really badly overacted
raw    unedited
simple story    underwritten
fluid camera style    rock video
vibrant    at least one nonwhite actor
urban    all nonwhite actors
transgressive    all gay cast
flamboyant    transgressive, in drag
uncompromisingly transgressive    male-male kissing
frank    lesbian cast
delirious    amateur
hybrid    appeals to fans of neither genre
majestic    dull
mood piece    plotless
moody    suicide inducing
sly    snide
surreal    random collection of shots
uplifting    naïve
warm, charming    inane
heart-wrenching    sappy
seamless    sleep inducing
oblique    opaque
challenging    absolutely unwatchable
intimate    home movie
meditative    endless
rich    overstuffed
original    gimmicky
eerie    depraved
unsettling    nauseating
understated    no dialogue
impressive    director managed to finish it